Firewood Processor Forum

A single mother of one, was passing by her daughter’s bedroom when she saw, to her shock, the bed was nicely made and everything was picked up. Then she saw an envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed, “Mom.” With the worst premonition, she opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Mom: It is with great regret and sorrow that I’m writing you. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with Dad and you. I’ve been finding real passion with Ahmed and he is so nice-even with all his piercings, tattoos, beard, and his motorcycle clothes. But it’s not only the passion Mom, I’m pregnant and Ahmed said that we will be very happy. He already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. He wants to have many more children with me and that’s now one of my dreams too. Ahmed taught me that marijuana doesn’t really hurt anyone and
we’ll be growing it for us and trading it with his friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want. In the meantime, we’ll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Ahmed can get better; he sure deserves it!! Don’t worry Mom, I’m 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I’m sure we’ll be back to visit so you can get to know your grand children.

Your daughter, Judith

PS: Mom, none of the above is true. I’m over at the neighbor’s house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that’s in my desk center drawer. I love you! Call when it is safe for me to come home.

OMG LMFAOOOOO

that's SOOOOOOOO FREAKIN HILARIOUS XD

I couldn't stop cracking upp,, I AM SOOOOOO GUNNA WRITE THIS and Put it on my bedd :D :D :D :D

<33 lmfao I love you

Hahaha, I've heard a different version of this. I think it's hilarious! I'd totally have done this as a kid if I was that witty.

EDIT:
Here's the guy version.
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A father, passing by his son's bedroom, was astonished to see
the bed nicely made and everything picked up off the floor. Then he saw the envelope propped up prominently on the center of the bed. It was addressed 'Dad'. With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:

Dear Dad, it is with great regret and sorrow that I'm writing this. I had to elope with my new girlfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mom and you. I've been finding real passion with Barbara and she is so nice, even with all her piercings, tattoos, and her tight motorcycle clothes. But it's not only the passion dad; she's pregnant and Barbara said that we will be very happy.

Even though you don't care for her as she is much older than I, she already owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewood for the whole winter. She wants to have many more children with me and that's now one of my dreams too. Barbara taught me that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone and we'll be growing it for ourselves and trading it with her friends for all the cocaine and ecstasy we want.

In the meantime, we'll pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Barbara can get better; she sure deserves it!! Don t worry dad, I'm 15 years old now and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure we'll be back to visit so you can get to know your grandchildren.

Your son.

P.S. Dad, none of this is true. I'm over at the neighbor's house. I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than my report card that's in my desk center drawer. I love you! (Call when it's safe for me to come home.)

WOW this is hilarious! Never heard it before!? ?

that's hilarious

that's hilarious

that's hilarious!!!

lmao thats hilarious!

classic

Lol, I tried that once.......I'm writing this answer from my friends computer......You think that she'd be over it less than two months, right?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!

XD XD